Expect Everything, Believe Nothing - In the Land of False Smiles
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I have lived in Thailand for 15 years. I have learned the language reasonably well, but I cannot write it. What I have studied extensively, however, is the behavior of the people, because that is what I enjoy. In the beginning I behaved like every foreigner should behave, reserved and with respect to the "foreign" culture.
At the creek, water mosses Taxiphyllum sp. and water ferns Leptochilus (Microsorum) sp. form magnificent stands where one likes to linger.
This went well until I realized that there is no real traditional culture at all. Pretty much everything in Thailand is "copy", mishmash and made up, in short: The people have no plan. After that, I oriented myself again according to my own liking, which mostly helped me - also in collecting a lot of stories. And my relatively early formed slogan for Thailand "Expect everything, believe nothing" has lasted until today.
Betta ferox is always a feast for the eyes, whether in a net..
...in the aquarium or taken directly in the microhabitat.
In one part of southern Thailand people still have very wild and original thoughts. Everything has happened to me here while inspecting certain animal and plant habitats: from bloody, broken nose to boundless fun translating German jokes into Thai and vice versa. The following, very funny and in the further course serious story should show that the inhabitants of Thailand are mentally not assessable by us "farang".
This is how you catch small catfish in southern Thailand.
The determination of catfishes of the genus Glyptothorax is difficult, the species shown in the picture is variable in color.
Curious everywhere
We were a small travel group of enthusiastic aquarists. One part was enthusiastic about labyrinth fishes, the other part about catfishes. We climbed up the eastern flank of the Khao Luang Mountains near the village of Hoi Moo. My destination was a spring at about 500m altitude in the mountain, from there the jungle stream to enter the river.
There, among some other fish species, especially the mouth-breeding fighting fish Betta ferox is common, as well as the snakehead fish Channa gachua. In some places along the stream in the primary forest beautiful biotopes with water mosses and ferns can be admired. After about five beautiful hours we reached the river where we found catfishes of the genus Glyptothorax as well as the extremely rheophilic (preferring flowing water) Ambliceps foratum .
Ambliceps foratum prefers flowing water.
We were quickly joined by children from the nearby village. As everywhere in the world, children are curious when strangers come. The encounters are always warm and fun and of course the kids always "know" about much more amazing fish species. These here also knew quite colorful fish, even red ones should be among them. I was skeptical, after all I already knew every kind of fish here in principle. Our bags were also already well filled with fish, so we went along laughing.
Channa gachua in the eastern Khao Luang area is very colorful, underwater photo of a male leading young.
Not far away, the river widened naturally and simple pools were made with stones. The children immediately started a wild catching battle - who knows if they were allowed to do so. They quickly arrived proudly with big, colorful fish. We had to laugh: They were koi! Colorful carp that someone must have been pimping. "Expect everything, believe nothing."
Quickly, the kids line up with prey. Photo Thomas Beu
Proud presentation. Photo: Mike Meuschke
Like the Wild West
My house is on the west side of the Khao Luang Mountains, opposite the habitats visited at noon. This makes a big difference ichthyologically, because the streams and rivers of this area drain into the largest river system in southern Thailand, the Mae Nam Tapi. The fish species composition is significantly different from that on the eastern flank. I wanted to show some interesting species especially to the catfish people.
To prepare for this, I dropped my guests off at home to watch the preparation of delicious Thai dishes. I set out again to look for favorable spots for the next day - the headwaters of the rivers in this region change after each rainy season.
After finding several promising spots, I stopped at a final spot on the river. I saw a stone bank in the river that was easy to get to, and I wanted to take home some pretty river stones to set up the next big flow-through aquariums with. After I had collected about 20 stones, a middle-aged man came and told me they were "his stones."
This was so unbelievable to me that I stopped, puzzled. Of course, I didn't want any trouble and stopped what I was doing. But the man wanted me to unload the loaded stones again. This went too far for me and I refused. My words that he could unload them himself must have made the man angry, because ...he fetched a gun!
This person actually threatened me with a gun because of some stones for the aquarium. Shortly after, two thugs of the place came to help him. Fortunately, I myself have no fearful feelings in such moments. My recipe is to appear courageous, energetic and very loud. That has always helped so far, and people then leave.
So far? Yes, this experience was not a one-off. There have been more since I've been living in Thailand, mainly in southern Thailand. Fortunately, Thai people are not only aggressive, but for the most part, they are rabbit's feet. Most of the time such clashes go well. But you also sometimes hear that a gun was fired. Yes, southern Thailand is like "Wild West", here of course in the negative sense. "Expect everything, believe nothing".
If this kind of story appeals, I can offer more. It's more about human weaknesses and fun situations, the kind that are more common in today's world. So-called adventure situations a la man-eater or tiger attack have become rather rare.
Also the descriptions about obscure mosquito swarms and, due to numerous land leeches, not to have a free place on the body, I spare myself. Such things take place almost daily. Rather, one should beware of huge long-horned beetles that sometimes bite one's nose. Of course there are also funny stories from other countries in the region, like Laos..
Text & Photos: Jens Kühne
Literature: Ng, H.H. & M. Kottelat (2016): The Glyptothorax of Sundaland: a revisionary study (Teleostei: Sisoridae). Zootaxa 4188 (1): 001-092
